Mikey

The house was talking

2005-04-05T02:36:32Z

So I went to Ann Arbor this weekend and saw a reggae band called The Intentions???, I thought they were pretty good, next door to the house the band was at was a talking house. I mean this was cool. Someone had set up a big screen TV on the porch and it had a mouth, in the two upper windows were two smaller tvs with eyes. The eyes were probably on a loop or something, and they would blink. His mouth must have had a camera on it, because it would move when he talked. He had a podium with a microphone so that you could ask him questions. I am not sure why they were doing this but it was pretty fuckin entertaining.

I would like to do the same thing some Halloween. Put a speaker by the door and turn the radio up LOOOOUUUUUUD, leave everything off until someone knocks on the door and then BOOOOOM!!!! Scare the living shit out of as many kids as possible the whole night through. I mean fuck why stop at Halloween? Do it every fuckin night, see what kind of freaks are a roamin.

3 Months and I will be off of probation! On July 13, 2005 I will have been on probation for 5 son of a mother fuckin years, and not 1 violation(that my po knows about).

oh yah the Body Works exhibit in Chicago, yah thats fucking awesome. If you can muster the funds for a day trip to Chicago, you should go check that out. It ends April 9th. Check that shit out!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Out of work and off to the bar I go, how many beers shall I drink? I dont know, where will my head rest, will I do any blow? Probably not,

Once you go green, you'll never go back

2005-02-24T22:21:28Z

And thats a fact, beeatch!!

HIT THAT SHIT!!! YEH

Heres another one, I am not sure where I came across this, I forgot, but I thought it was very horrifying, ENJOY!!!!

To...Infinity and Beyond!!!!!!!!!!

a

2004-11-20T07:29:59Z

so i have been doing some thinking and meditating lately ya know focusing on my body and trying to figure out if there are any grey areas areas that may have problems ie stress or disease or what not and i have figured out that i have little aliens living in my toes i think everyone else may have them as well i think this is where they are incubating within all of our bodies they just sit there and feed off of us they are parasites when we die and are buried they pop out and burrow there way underground and live in a state of hibernation patiently waiting for the day of awakening when they have sufficient numbers and can take over the world all i can say is that every one of us should seriously start contemplating cremation.

Hi

2004-09-13T03:54:16Z

Well hello livejournal users. I was down at the office bar here in the wonderful planned community called Jackson, and I do believe I saw one of the best bands I have ever seen live. The band was and still is called Natives of the new dawn. Oh my god they were fuckin great. They are from Detroit (now i know some of you reading this live in the detroit area if you ever get a chance to see these guys do not pass them up!!!)the jacktown hustlers played a show with them and got them to come out to jackson to play. These guys were amazing that is all I can say. If you can find a way to get a hold of there cd do it.
The keyboard player is a ron jeremy clone, well from what i could see, fortunately he was fully clothed. If you like the jacktown hustlers you can get a few of their songs of their web site. do it!!!

I feel like an old man

2004-04-29T00:44:10Z

So, my son started preschool this year, just had his 5th birthday and he starts t-ball tomorrow. It all seems so weird to me. I feel really young still(probably because I am), not like a dad. I just can't get used to this whole daddy thing. Not that I don't like it because I love it, it just seems really weird. I still feel like a fuckin kid. I don't want to be responsible and get up every morning and take him to school and go to work so I have money to spend on him, but I do it and on some deep, weird level that I do not like to share with many people, I get a wonderful satisfaction out of it.
But enough about me, lets talk a little about..umm..well, yah lets just talk more about me(god i am such a selfish of shit)...
So I have a girlfriend, I really like her, its weird having a girlfriend too, but enough about that....
Also my buddy Josh Mckrackhead is in town, so now I have my partner in Retardism for a couple of weeks. It is going to be MUCH FUN!!!!=)
Erin he told me to tell you hello, and anyone else who may read this that knows him, I am sure he says hello too.
-And I'm out, like the fat boy in dodge ball!

ouch!!!

2004-01-26T01:09:41Z

So my bosses kids are assholes, they try to live out jackass in every way every fuckin day of their existence. They walk up to each other and start punching each other or they wait until someone goes into the bathroom to do a #2 and they open the door and start thwarting the innocent shitter with whatever is handy, basically they are just assholes. Well today one was standing by me and looking at me all crazy, I told him to get the fuck away from me, because he had been irritating me all day. He pulled his hand out of his pocket like he was going to throw something at me so I swung to knock it out of his hand. Well, wouldn't ya know, it was a knife and it STABBED RIGHT INTO MY FUCKIN HAND!!!!!!!! I unfortunately could not contain myself and I slapped him, call me an asshole but I would have liked to have done allot more. I should have gone and got stitches but dis mutha fucka dont be doin hospitals ya know what i'm sayin, 911 is jokie joke town..plus I don't like needles. Other than this minor incident, life is good, except for the fact I do not have a hmm what do you call those things again, oh yah girlfriend, its been awhile, kinda depressing... for me anyway. Well peace out and have a good life, I am going to go play with all the interesting little things I can see on the inside of my hand now.

ANTIDISESTABLISHMENTARIANISM

2004-01-12T22:57:10Z

COOLEST WEBPAGE IN THE WORLD=)ERR MAYBE NOT.

http://www.antidisestablishmentarianism.com/

COOLEST WORD IN THE WORLD... KIND OF(WHY DO SCIENTISTS THINK THEY NEED TO MAKE RIDICULOUSLY LONG WORDS?)
"The full name of the tryptophan synthetase A protein, an enzyme with 267 amino acids"

methionylglutaminylarginyltyrosylglutamylserylleucylphenylalanylalanylglutaminylleucyllysylglutamylarginyllysylglutamylglycylalanylphenylalanylvalylprolylphenylalanylvalylthreonylleucylglycylaspartylprolylglycylisoleucylglutamylglutaminylserylleucyllysylisoleucylaspartylthreonylleucylisoleucylglutamylalanylglycylalanylaspartylalanylleucylglutamylleucylglycylisoleucylprolylphenylalanylserylaspartylprolylleucylalanylaspartylglycylprolylthreonylisoleucylglutaminylaspfraginylalanylthreonylleucylarginylalanylphenylalanylalanylalanylglycylvalylthreonylprolylalanylglutaminylcysteinylphenylalanylglutamylmethionylleucylalanylleucylisoleucylarginylglutaminyllysylhistidylprolylthreonylisoleucylprolylisoleucylglycylleucylleucylmethionyltyrosylalanylasparaginylleucylvalylphenylalanylasparaginyllysylglycylisoleucylaspartylglutamylphenylalanyltyrosylalanylglutaminylcysteinylglutamyllysylvalylglycylvalylaspartylserylvalylleucylvalylalanylaspartylvalylprolylvalylglutaminylglutamylserylalanylprolylphenylalanylarginylglutaminylalanylalanylleucylarginylhistidylasparaginylvalylalanylprolylisoleucylphenylalanylisoleucylcysteinylprolylprolylaspartylalanylaspartylaspartylaspartylleucylleucylarginylglutaminylisoleucylalanylseryltyrosylglycylarginylglycyltyrosylthreonyltyrosylleucylleucylserylarginylalanylglycylvalylthreonylglycylalanylglutamylasparaginylarginylalanylalanylleucylprolylleucylasparaginylhistidylleucylvalylalanyllysylleucyllysylglutamyltyrosylasparaginylalanylalanylprolylprolylleucylglutaminylglycylphenylalanylglycylisoleucylserylalanylprolylaspartylglutaminylvalyllysylalanylalanylisoleucylaspartylalanylglycylalanylalanylglycylalanylisoleucylserylglycylserylalanylisoleucylvalyllysylisoleucylisoleucylglutamylglutaminylhistidylasparaginylisoleucylglutamylprolylglutamyllysylmethionylleucylalanylalanylleucyllysylvalylphenylalanylvalylglutaminylp rolylmethion yllysylalanylalanylthreonylarginylserine.

NOW CLASS THERE WILL BE A VERBAL SPELLING TEST ON THIS WORD FIRST THING TOMMORROW MORNING.

OH YAH, LOTS OF TIME TO KILL AT MY JOB!!!!!!

FURNISHING ALCOHOL TO MINORS????

2003-07-23T18:57:16Z

WELL IT HAS BEEN A FEW MONTHS SINCE I HAVE USED THIS THING AND NOT MUCH HAS HAPPENED,NOT THAT ANYONE REALLY CARES =) or =( I HAVE BEEN LOST IN MY OWN LITTLE WORLD OF SHIT. A FEW NIGHTS AGO I WAS LYING IN MY SOUND ASLEEP, I HEARD MY DOOR OPEN AND I LOOKED AT THE CLOCK, IT WAS 3:30 IN THE A.M, SO I SAID "IF THIS IS NOT AN EMERGENCY GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY ROOM!"
AFTER I SAID THAT A FLASHLIGHT CLICKED ON AND WAS POINTING DIRECTLY INTO MY EYES, SO I JUMPED OUT OF BED AND STARTED YELLING THEN THE LIGHT IN MY ROOM CLICKS ON AND WHAT DO I SEE A FUCKIN STATE POLICE OFFICER STANDING IN MY DOORWAY WITH MY, DRUNKEN 20 YEAR OLD ROOMATE, JOEL.
SO I GO DOWNSTAIRS AND SIT ON THE COUCH AND THE COP GOES AND KNOCKS ON MY OTHER ROOMATES DOOR, HE TELLS THE COP TO FUCK OFF AND GET OUT OF HIS FACE, THINKING IT WAS SOMEONE IN THE HOUSE MESSING WITH HIM. THEN HIS LIGHT WENT ON AND HE SAW THE SAME THING I DID, AND BECAME COOPERATIVE REAL QUICK.
SO TO MAKE A LONG STORY SHORT, A CALL WAS MADE ON A PARTY DOWN THE ROAD SOMEHOW THE COPS ENDED UP IN MY HOUSE (I STILL HAVE NOT FIGURED THAT OUT) THEY GAVE JOEL AND HIS FRIEND MIPs AND TOLD ME THEY WERE GOING TO CHARGE ME WITH FURNISHING MINORS WITH ALCOHOL. I DID NOT BUY THE SHIT, I DO NOT BUY ALCOHOL FOR MINORS, FOR THIS EXACT FUCKING REASON. JOEL WAS NOT EVEN HOME WHEN I WENT TO BED. THE COP SAID THAT SINCE MY NAME WAS ON THE LEASE IT IS MY JOB TO MAKE SURE THERE IS NO UNDERAGE DRINKING IN MY HOUSE.
HOW THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO THAT WHEN I AM SLEEPING? AM I SUPPOSED TO TRAVEL THE ASTRAL PLANE AND KICK HIS FUCKING ASS, I THINK NOT.
SO ANYWAY I AM GOING TO GET A LAWYER AND FIGHT THIS TICKET, BECAUSE IT IS BUUULLLLLLSHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
IF I LOOSE, IT WILL BE A VIOLATION OF MY PROBATION AND I WILL BE TAKING A 2 YEAR, ALL EXPENSES PAID, VACATION COURTESY OF THE STATE OF MICHIGAN. SOUNDS LIKE BIG FUN, HEH!!!! 3 HOTS AND A COT, I'D RATHER NOT BEING WEARING SHACKLES AND CHAINS. LIFE IS SO MUCH FUN SOMETIMES

xeonified @ 2003-02-13T00:31:00

2003-02-13T05:36:06Z

The training has started battles are being fought.
Our brains are being tested for everything we were taught
Now is the time to dig into your thoughts and desires
Shake those doubts and throw more wood on those fires

Life is just as boring today as it was years ago

2003-02-13T05:10:18Z

The "Board of Trustees" or the "Committee" I call my brain is starting to get really fucking bored with the same shit. My life seems to be one big revolving cycle of shit. No matter what I do to try to change it I always fall back into the same place. The only conclusion I can come to is that I am in no way doing what I want to be doing. I am not even taking steps in the right direction.
I don't think there is much of a future for the avenue of life I want to walk, here in the M.I., but I have a son that I really can't leave. I would not really be leaving him though, would I? The committee in brain brain says no, but everyone else says yes. I have no fucking clue what the fuck to do. I guess I should just sit back and see what cards I get dealt. The hand I just got dealt was pretty fuckin shafty, but Its my fucking turn to deal and I am going to attempt to stack the deck to my advantage=)=)=)=)=)=)

boom boom ba boom boom ba boom boom

2003-01-18T15:23:47Z

So I am going back to my African Roots...I got into this African drumming and dance class and it fuckin rocks! The teachers brother teaches at a university in Africa and JCC bought 14 of these handmade drums from some drum guy over there and now boom boom ba boom boom ba boom boom. The drums are so cool. We are going to be performing in about a month and a half. It will be very fun. So that is all I have to say. Thank and I think I am a black man stuck in a honkys body

whooooo!

2003-01-06T03:29:24Z

so lastnight i'm driving to Detroit to see my drunken family, and i just pass Ann Arbor and this guy slams on his brakes. I was going 80, and could not stop in time because the roads were slick. I have no insurance on my truck so i drove into the median rather than the guys really nice car.

I look over to see why the fuck he stopped and there was no reason other than to piss me off i guess, because there were was no deer or dead child or anyfuckinthing. So i got out and pulled my fender out and went on my way.

Early yesterday i ran out of gas because i thought i had enough to make it to work, but guess what.... i didn't! So i walked 20 minutes to the gas station and then 20 back. just lovely.

And the day before yesterday my axle got caught up on a rock and neither of my rear tires were touching the ground, so my neighbor helped rock the truck from side to side and it came free...after 15min of rocking.

So that is about all that is happening in my life, whoop fuckin E.

another year come and gone

2003-01-01T16:50:36Z

i guess the world is still turning and i didn't get blown up so...lastnight was good. i went a bunch of places, saw alot of old faces and a couple new, and a one i hope to see again soon. though i doubt i will. i woke up this morning feeling exactly as i did when i went to bed...tired. So i wil now go and take a nap.Happy new year to everyone. PEEEEEEEAACCCE

My dixie wrect and there is nothing I can do about it

2002-12-23T04:24:26Z

In a land of hands and legs, a place with no heads or dreads, just hands and legs. A place where fingers are free to do as they please, no respect for authority. In the land of hands and legs, whatever tickles your fancy, there would be no nancys, sandys, or freds, just toes arms and legs. Little fingers doing whatever they please, roaming, exploring, forging new territories. Finding new crevices to explore, finding new fetishes to adore, how wonderful it would be... the land of hands and legs. The feet, no longer have the weight of the body to bear, the legs have no more cares. They are left on their own, to roam. What will they do? Where will they go? I really do not know, for i am not a toe, and i know not where a toe would go. But i would guess he would go, to the land of pantyhose, for any joe knows, that pantyhose ain't nuthin but hoes. So back to reality, and the question of bisexuality, would a finger want to know a toe...sexualy? Its a question i never pondered till now, and upon thinking about it, I think i'll end the thought now

waiting

2002-12-18T07:05:47Z

uneventful day. Now I am sitting here waiting for myself to get tired, so I can go to sleep. I have to be up and around early in the morning so hopefully sleep comes soon

to move or not

2002-12-16T03:01:10Z

I had a very goooooood night lastnight. I went Detroit to see my sisters play, it was very, very funny. Espescialy when the guys dixie recked. Anyways I went to my sisters new apartment in Hamtramick, it was pretty nice. After the play we went to see this band play at this little hole called whiskey in a jar, there were so many wierd fuckin people there. It was an interesting experience to say the most. My sister wants me to come and live with her. I am seriously contemplating it. I mean realy why shouldn't I? The only reason I don't want to is becasue I have a fucking cake walk of a job, and make great money, but I'm thinking I would be happier there. There would be more for me to do to keep my mind and interests occupied and I would be closer to my son. I think I might do it, I don't know.

a funny moment in an otherwise unfunny day

2002-12-14T03:59:27Z

So i'm just sittin here surfin around on the net, my dad was watching tv and my little brother was sleeping on the couch. My little brother stands up and (sleep)walks into the dark kitchen and says,"dad I need you to come into the kitchen and play for a minute." My dad goes what? and goes into the kitchen and turns on the light, my little brother was standing over the heat vent getting ready to pee in it.
So my dad stops him and starts to take him upstairs to the bathroom, but as they come to the stairs my brother runs back into the kitchen and trys to climb into the garbage can. My dad trys to stop him, but my brother starts crying, so my dad puts him in the garbage can.
He then trys to take him out but my brother starts crying so he left him in there for a couple minutes, until he was out cold, and then took him out. My brother wakes up as my dads taking him out of the garbage can, and asks my dad what he was doing there. How fucking wierd is that. sleep walking/talking runs in my family, does any one else have this problem?

xeonified @ 2002-12-13T22:35:00

2002-12-14T03:39:31Z

this little ditty i dedicate to the psycho who has nothing better to do with her petty existence than fuck with mine.
lies and deciet
thats all you know
you aint nothin
but a
little fuckin hoe
drop down
turn around
squirm in pain
wretched little bitch
fuckin with my brain
........slowly
.....but.......
......surely..
driving.....me...
.....insane.....
your games
never ending
your lows
forever descending
no matter how far
i push you away
you always find
a way
to fuck up my day.....

bitch

same shtuff different day

2002-12-13T02:53:11Z

well today was another totally boring day in the life of mike i got up early as f#ck and went to work i left work went to the the good ol auto parts store and bought myself a head light finally it took me about an hour to put the damn thing in because that corner of my truck is so mangled you gotta watch those damn poles they run right out in front of ya when you're driving anyways i have to take it to the police station tomorow to take care of the fix it ticket i got the other night can you believe the fucking nerve of a cop i got a fix it ticket a few days ago then another cop gave me another damn ticket last night how cool is that i have to get two of the same damn tickets taken care of because cops are FUCKING ASSHOLES anyways i am going to see my sisters play this weekend it should be very funny

grrrrrrr

2002-12-12T04:06:36Z

thoughts un pure, thoughts unkind, thoughts of infinity....lost in time, thoughts of mayhem, thoughts of rage, thoughts of misery for the rest of my days, thoughts of happiness, thoughts untrue, thoughts of resentment toward you, thoughts of god, thoughts of pea pods, tie rods and vice squads,thoughts of esplanades, fishing rods, and firing squads, thoughts of expeditions, ambitions and positions(preferably doggy), thoughts of petitions, munitions and sedition, thoughts of euphoria, thoughts of a sage, thoughts of the Phoenix burning up the rest of our days, and thoughts of sparkling dandelion wine with a couple drops of turpentine, these are just a few thoughts of mine.

love me some tasty pastrys

2002-12-09T07:54:26Z

well i had a pretty damn uneventful day, but i had a wonderful conversation with a tasty pastry named dre, and then i went to bed.

fill in the blanks

2002-12-09T03:50:02Z

___ ______ __ ________ ____ _-___ _______ ___ _______ ____ _________ ________ __.

the paranoid cookie thief

2002-12-08T07:31:09Z

The sun is going to be rising soon, time seems to just stand still. I think all this may just pass. It's been hours since I did it. I don't think any one heard a thing, I think i'm in the clear. My wife is still fast asleep. She sleeps like a log.
What about the kids? Did they hear me creeping down the hallway past their door to the stairs and then into the kitchen? My wife would kill me if she knew I was still snacking in the middle of the night! I knew I should have replaced the floors in this fucking antique farm house.
When this was an active farm, I wonder if the man worried about his wife finding out he was having midnight snacks? FUCK NO HE DIDN'T, because he lived in a time when men were men and women knew there place. There was none of this feminist shit, if a women had a problem...then... then..,SHE JUST BETTER SHUT HER FUCKIN MOUTH, SHOVE THAT PROBLEM RIGHT UP HER ASS, AND COOK ME SOME FOOD, shit! did i just say that out loud? my wife would kill me if she heard me say something like that. Well I'll quit worrying for now, I'll just have to get up early and wake up the kids. I'll tell them we are going to go to the beach and go swimming, but on the way there I am going to have to drive the car off a cliff or something, because I know them little bastards heard me. I didn't get that playstation II for tommys birthday and I just know he still has it out for me. Yeah I'm just gonna have to get rid of them thats all, but how??? I think I'll just sleep on it.

THANKYOU

2002-12-06T06:47:20Z

well i feel a hell of alot better though my entry there made no sense i just needed to do a little venting i cannot sleep i cannot sleep and i have to get up in a few hours and i am starting to feel a little irritated all i want is sleep i slept for 4 hours lastnight and i cant sleep i cant sleep i have an extremely long day ahead of me tommorrow and i cant sleep blah fucking blah eep op ork ork boom nanu nanu el burro sabe mas que tu.

OUR PURPOSE?

2002-12-06T06:41:14Z

I HAVE COME TO THE CONCLUSION THAT HUMANS ARE MEANT TO DO ONE THING, AND ONE THING ONLY, AND THAT IS TO MATE AND PROCREATE. EVERYTHING ELSE WE DO IS JUST SOMETHING TO OCCUPY OUR TIME UNTIL THAT MAGICAL MOMENT WHEN VIOLA! THE ACT OF PLEASURE REARS ITS BEAUTIFUL HEAD AND WE CAN PUT ON OUR O FACES. I MEAN REALLY, WHY SHOULD WE BE EXPECTED TO DO ANYTHING ELSE. WE LIVE EACH DAY OUR LIVES DOING DIFFERENT THINGS, AND ALL WE END UP DOING IS MAKING IT MORE COMPLICATED AND IN THE END WE END UP MORE STRESSED OUT. THE MAJORITY OF THE PEOPLE IN THIS WORLD LIVE SUPERFICIAL EXISTENCES, BUT THINK EVERYTHING THEY SAY IS SOME SORT OF PROFOUND REVELATION. WHEN IN REALITY, ALL THAT IS COMING FROM THEIR UNIMPORTANT MOUTHS IS TOXIC SLUDGE THAT BURNS AND SEARS EVERYTHING WORTH WHILE AND TRUE. LIES AND DECEIT.